Top Ten Reasons I Dislike Other Drivers **Warning: this post contains pretty words**

I commute Monday through Thursday every week to work.  My drive is about 50 minutes where 30 of it is on a highway with 2 lanes (one in each direction) and the other 20 minutes is four lane.

Since being back at work for a month now, I'm again reminded of how bad people are at driving and what really pisses me off about it. 

My frustration is mounting once again and the birds are flying.

Here you go.  My top ten things I hate about other drivers.  If you find yourself falling under one of these categories, please go to your local DMV and kindly hand over your driver's license because you fucking suck.

10.  Not waiting your turn at a four way stop or any stop for that matter.  Sure, Mr. BMW you do have the far superior car out of all of us here who have been patiently waiting our turn to go.  But go ahead, you fucking deserve it.

9.  Oh hey ciggy smoker, that is just what I wanted, that cute little butt to your cancer stick flying at my car and potentially being sucked through my open window.  No that's fine, I wasn't really enjoying the fresh air.  I mean, why would I when I can suck up all that secondhand smoke you emit.  You fucking rock.  Keep on keeping on.

8.  Dear morning, afternoon and night slow driver.  I never allow myself enough time to make it anywhere going the speed limit so would you please relocate your GD accelerator and GO!  Better yet, just pull over and let me pass.

7.  For the love of the environment at least, get your stink-mobile fixed.  I shouldn't get a headache from following you for 5 seconds.

6.  Those who never allow others to pass them on the open road.  Yes, you, person who will pass me, merge into my lane and then proceed to go the speed limit or less.  Don't even think of passing these people because it won't happen.  For some reason, they rediscover their accelerator the second they feel threatened.

5.  To the people who don't know how to operate their turn signals and slam on their brakes two feet before they need to turn, here's a big fuck you.

4.  I drive a Grand Prix but it does not mean that I think I have a race car under my two hands.  No, I will not be partaking in your game of "race me across the line".  Also, nothing pisses me off more then when you race me across said line to only slam on your breaks and turn fifty feet after.  Drive off a cliff.  Kidding.

3.  The swervers.  You know those people who swerve in and out of traffic, across three lanes on the highway, cut people off and  probably cause the majority of accidents.  Yep, you really should consider driving off a cliff and I'm not kidding.

2.   Mini-vans and Ford Focus'.  Maybe I'm generalizing but the owners of these two machines are the worst drivers in America. 

1.  Other drivers are assholes.  Period.  I guess that's why they call it defensive driving.

I'm confident Quinn will hear her first curse words, if she hasn't already, while in the car with her mom.  I guess she has to learn sometime.


  1. Do you know how fucking amazing this post is? OMFG I LOVE YOU

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    ...this is exactly why I avoid driving at all costs!

  4. LMAO!!

    I'm your newest follower and would love it if you could follow me back :)

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    I love it!


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